Last Saturday I hurt my toe in ballet. At the very end of class I came down on it wrong and bruised it badly. It really hurt. It was surprising that such a little thing could cause such big pain. I have learn a lot about myself because of it.
The first thing that went through my mind when it happened was, 'how am I going to do all that needs to be done?' We finished class with pirouette and I got to experience how bad I hurt it. I needed ice. Lots and lots of ice. My toe declared, 'you must slow down.' At that moment I decided to be thankful for my screaming toe, and learn to love what was given: a stop of activity. That would included walking and dancing for a few days. I got to watch football, play Octonauts, read aloud, and stay home. You sometime don’t realize how fast you are going until you stop. I learned to slow down and it was good for me.
I went back to ballet Wednesday. I was scared of hurting my toe further. I began plies carefully. In my mind I knew how important it was to keep a cool head and breath through each exercise. If I panicked I would hurt myself more. I planned on doing what I could do well, and letting the rest fall like water. I found that I had to lean into my body's physical and mental strength. I learned it is better to be relaxed and thoughtful, because that is when your strength comes through.
I hurt my toe because I started to apologize for hitting the dancer next to me while I was in the air during a combination. Note to self: it is ok to not always apologize for everything. Or at least finish the combination first.
I am so thankful for this week and the lessons I learned.
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